Girl, this is Yannick speaking here, and today’s blog post is super important. Like, for real.

And this goes way beyond your fitness goals.
This affects so many aspects of your life, that I don’t even know where to begin, so I’ll just tell you a very quick version of my story.

I was in a long-term relationship for 5 years, and we were considering buying an apartment together. I thought she was “the one”, but the relationship ended very abruptly.

After that, I spent 5 years alone. During that time, I really thought about what I wanted in a relationship. This is also when I got into sports again, and training & nutrition literally changed my life.

Eventually, I got into another relationship that was pretty solid, or at least that’s what I thought.
We even moved in together. But it wasn’t meant to be, and this illustrates it very well: as I was in a diet phase, tracking my food, my then girlfriend, with whom I just moved in, generously put butter in the veggies, saying something like “butter makes everything better, you can’t use too much of it”.

This might sound super trivial, but I snapped.
Of course, there are a lot of other things that went into it, but the relationship ended within 2 months. I moved out again and shortly after my love story with my now-wife Dragana began.

What I realized was that my goals were not really taken into consideration by my partner.
My values were not shared by my partner, who had no real ambition as far as fitness goes.

This is absolutely fine. Not everyone wants to lift 300 kg from the floor and experience what it means to look like a Greek statue.

But life is freaking short & precious, and I’m certain you have very good reasons to have fitness goals – so you need to protect this.

Ferociously.

Being ok to spend your life with someone who isn’t supporting you to achieve your full potential isn’t just slowing you down.

It is a big waste of your time, and it just doesn’t make any sense.

Call me radical here.
And I might be.
But if you haven’t suffered deeply because your needs & desires are not taken into account in your relationship, learn from me:

life is fucking amazing when you are indeed radical about your goals.

Yes, it takes courage to face uncertainty and maybe even being alone for some time.
But it is freakin’ worth it.

If you are single right now, here’s what you should do:

👉🏼 Make a list with three columns.

👉🏼 In the first one, you write down all the non-negotiables, what you absolutely want in your life and in your relationship.

👉🏼 In the second one, the “nice-to-haves”, what would be cool bonuses, but you could also do without them.

👉🏼 In the third one, you write down all the dealbreakers. For me, the biggest ones were a lack of interest in fitness, no big ambition & desire to grow, and a low-risk tolerance.

If you are in a relationship right now, do the same.
Then, make sure to communicate very clearly about the things that are in the first column. Always speak from your point of view, explaining why this is important to you and what the ideal scenario would be.
If you notice that you find a lot of items from the third column in your relationship, be honest with yourself and ask yourself deeply whether your goals are really your goals and matter that much to you, or if this is really the right relationship for you.

Don’t sell yourself short.
Don’t settle for less.
You got this.

Yannick

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